With #COVID19 still ravaging Spaceship Earth, which has claimed the life of two of my friends, and the anniversary of the death of my Tico friend, Arturo, the cycle of life preoccupies my mind as much as my social media feeds.
Currently, in a violent nationwide reaction to the atrocity of George Floyd’s death – American citizens have been rioting. More death, more destruction, more ugliness.
The questions that preoccupies my mind are manyfold. If I were to die today, then did I live a full life? Did I live the #AmericanDream of a wife, children, etc?
I understand the importance of using all of my daily 86,400 seconds. And if you don’t know, then here’s my post regarding the point.
While I appreciate the boldness of living your best life, one thing I’ve learned is you can’t take back any spoken word. Like a nail to a piece of wood, once hammered in and the nail removed – the hole is still there, the damage is done.
Then again, if I was dying and knew my time was limited would I, should I tell my crush I have an infatuation with them?
Would You, Should You, Tell Your Crush?
My answer to you if you asked me: no. Keep that secret to yourself, and to your grave. My reasoning for the answer is not so straightforward.
My reasoning also speaks from experience, as I did tell a crush that happened to be a co-worker and a friend. As far as the degree-scale for ideas are concern: this is a bad idea!
For all sad words of tongue and pen, The saddest are these, ‘It might have been’.– John Greenleaf Whittier
The announcement changed the dynamic of our rapport immediately. She didn’t feel the same as I did about her. Ugh, unrequited love. I would rank that feeling in the top 5 next to grief of a love one, betrayal of a lover, and knowing you love someone that doesn’t love you back.
And it is love, per se? Or is it a fabrication of love? All I know is telling your crush about your feelings is woefully bad idea, coming from the King of Bad Ideas. Even if you’re dying, I still say no. When I did I instantly regretted it, too, like the village idiot shattering a sacred mirror.
All the broken shards of glass scattering across a slick concrete floor …
Once it was no longer a fantasy, the narrative moved into real-life fusion. I no longer saw her in all perfection. I started to look for imperfections that I had previously overlooked in favor a fantastical view point of her.
I found line item after line item how she’s not fitting on my Mrs Right Checklist.
I would no longer seek her out for conversation, and another opportunity to make her laugh or flirt with her. Or to demonstrate I am her next best partner that will “treat her better than the guy she’s with”. Or dress better for that chance encounter which she notices the extra time I took. It was all really saddening, to be honest.
I dunno know if she felt bad or guilty for not having reciprocating feelings. I suspect no. Why would she? I’m the one who put her on an ivory pedestal. She reacted the same: no longer sought me out, any outside-of-work activity was Friend Zoned.
So … Spaceship Earth, if you were dying, and had an opportunity Would You, Should You, Tell Your Crush? Comment below.
Until next time, be good like you should, and if you can’t be good, be good at what you DO.