Elephants have always fascinated me. Their sheer size alone commands awe, but it’s their memory, their gentleness, and their family bonds that give them their mystique. You don’t just look at an elephant; you feel the presence of one. Maybe that’s why the phrase so often tied to them — “Never forget” — resonates deeper than a quip about big ears and bigger brains.

What do we choose to never forget? For me, memory isn’t just about holding onto the highlight reel. It’s about carrying the heavy things too: the grief, the losses, the hard lessons. Those memories shape who we become just as much as the joyful ones.

If you know me well, you know I’m a storyteller. When a friend, a co-worker, or a loved one mentions something, chances are I’ll recall a story, an anecdote, or a lesson. It’s not me trying to one-up them. It’s my way of relating, of socializing, of saying, “I see you, I hear you, I’ve lived something like that too.” In a way, those stories are my herd’s migration paths — the memories I return to, the ones that help me navigate today.

Elephants do the same.

They’re the keepers of a herd’s history. They remember old migration paths, water holes long dried up, and dangers avoided generations ago. Their survival depends on remembering. Humans aren’t so different. I know my own survival has depended on remembering — remembering where I’ve stumbled, remembering who I’ve loved, remembering what I’ve lost.

There’s also an old adage: sometimes you’re standing too close to the elephant to see the whole animal. The same is true in life. When you’re in the thick of it, all you see is the rough hide in front of your face. It’s only when you step back — or time gives you distance — that the full shape comes into view. Perspective can be the difference between confusion and clarity, between pain and wisdom.

An Elephant of a Different Kind 🐘🎁

Since we’re on the subject of elephants, let me share one from my archives. Over seven years ago, I wrote a post about the chaos of holiday parties titled “White Elephant vs Gift Exchange Parties: How I Was Tricked!”

Here’s the gist:

The idiom “white elephant” comes from the King of Siam, who supposedly gave rare albino elephants to courtiers who displeased him. Owning one was ruinously expensive — a “gift” that was more burden than blessing. That legend turned into our modern White Elephant Party, where the gifts are supposed to be funny, gaudy, or unwanted. The opposite of a Gift Exchange Party, where gifts are useful, desirable, and maybe even a little boring.

I once learned this lesson the hard way. A co-worker (who I later nicknamed ERBF for her Epic Resting… well, you can guess the rest) invited me to what she swore was a White Elephant party. I bought the most ridiculous “As Seen on TV” item I could find. The day of the party — midday of a workday, in fact, midweek — the first gift unwrapped was… a gorgeous candle set. And the next was something just as nice. Meanwhile, my gag gift sat there like a landmine until it was finally mine to unwrap. Cue me mean-mugging across the room while silently vowing to never be tricked again.

That old story still makes me laugh — and it’s another reminder of how elephants, in one way or another, keep marching through my life. Sometimes they carry memory, sometimes they carry perspective, and sometimes… they carry awkward party gifts no one wants.

And yet, elephants don’t live in the past.

They move.

They continue on, together, trunk to tail. Maybe that’s the wisdom we can borrow from them. To remember, yes. To honor what came before. But also to keep going.

Today is Elephant Appreciation Day, and sure, it’s a lighthearted “national day” on the calendar. But for me, it’s also a small invitation: to pause, to take stock, and to appreciate the weight of memory. Some memories lift me, some anchor me, and some sting in ways that never go away. But they’re all mine.

So I’m choosing to never forget — not the laughter, not the heartbreak, not the lessons, and not the love. Like the elephant, I’ll carry them with me.

What about you? What’s worth never forgetting?