Unless you’ve been underneath a rock, or been held captive in a remote part of the world, then you know that Super Bowl LVIII happened on February 11, 2024.
Now that I have your attention, I can further explain myself as to why I “forced” to be a Kansas City Chiefs fan.
I moved from the Seattle area to Arizona in 2023. I was born and raise there for 40 plus years. I am, and ALWAYS will be a Seattle Seahawks fan! If that’s the case, how did I become a Chiefs fan? Read on for more.
The past year I’ve been living with Brett Underwood in Tempe with Sterling. Brett is the owner of this property thus he is the “house boss” [LANDLORD is too feudal, and frankly outdated speak] His house, his rules.
Once the date of Super Bowl LVIII was announced, he requested that day off. Since he requested the day off, he declared he was hosting a Super Bowl Sunday Party. By virtue of being a renter, I was invited to said-party.
I didn’t plan on watching it because I despise the fanbases of most other NFL Teams. Even more so for the San Francisco 49ers because they are a NFC West divisional rival. However, Fate / the Universe / God / no Gods / the gods, had other plans …
SUPER BOWL SUNDAY
February 11, 2024, Sunday was the 2nd day of my 9-day holiday (VAY – CAY – SHON to all Americans) I honestly, planned on staying overnight in an Arizonian city / town. My good-time-adventure buddy, Audrey text me that she would like to watch the SB. Then my broesph / her husband hits me up with the same: wanna watch the SB.
Ok, sure.
Then HBB [House Boss Brett] delegates to me the meatballs; essentially a cook. I mentally sighed. I invite my brofessor, Scott and his wife, Sidney, to join us as well. At least I would know 4 people at this soirée! The Wildes bailed for legitimate reasons, and Scott posted up alone, because Sidney was working that Sunday but would arrive later.
I gnashed my teeth together in frustration. Great, I know 2 people, I mentally complained. And I live with one of them.
Slowly party-goers arrived. HBB’s surname is well know in the area, as they have lived in the area for over 30 years. Basically, everyone knows the Underwoods. They are friendly group, so this is not surprising. With any crowd though, you’ll have a cross-section of America whether you like it or not.
Two woman friends of Brett arrived together, dressed similarly, and look enough to be related [even if they were just friends] There was plenty of food, and drink available before kick off, so we all dove in. She introduced herself and her friend to Scott and I since we were posted up in the living room with the TV on.
They were so horrible that I forgot their names! [While I rarely forget a face, the name-thing is different] As the four of us were watching the game in the first quarter, I detected that the red-haired girl wasn’t versed in football as she thought she was.
Brock Prudy, the San Francisco 49ers quarterback, tossed a sideline pass that sailed on him therefore his intended target had ZERO-chance of catching. From the couch, but looking towards me, she bellowed, “That’s pass interference!”
I pursed my lips together, and shook my head for the universal sign of “NO“.
~ https://operations.nfl.com/the-rules/nfl-video-rulebook/defensive-pass-interference/Rule 8, Section 5
PASS INTERFERENCE
It is pass interference by either team when any act by a player more than one yard beyond the line of scrimmage significantly hinders an eligible player’s opportunity to catch the ball. Pass interference can only occur when a forward pass is thrown from behind the line of scrimmage, regardless of whether the pass is legal or illegal, or whether it crosses the line.
Defensive pass interference rules apply from the time the ball is thrown until the ball is touched. See Article 2 for prohibited acts while the ball is in the air.
Offensive pass interference rules apply from the time the ball is snapped until the ball is touched. See Article 2 for prohibited acts while the ball is in the air and Article 4 for prohibited acts prior to the pass.
QUICK! Call The WHAMBULANCE!
A few plays later, a penalty flag was thrown on the ground, as with a ton more followed, which is affectionally known as laundry. I murmured, “Most likely offensive holding (against San Francisco)” She glared at me in my seat, “That was definitely defensive holding!”
NFL Referee with a microphone, “Holding, on San Francisco. 10 yard penalty.”
While in the field of play, offensive holding results in a 10-yard penalty, or half the distance to the goal line when there are fewer than 20 yards between the line of scrimmage and the offense’s end zone. If the act of holding is committed from within the offense’s own end zone, the result is a safety.
She retorted, “How did you know that?”
I wanted to punch her in the throat, as she being an obnoxious, alcohol-fueled tool. I choose peace instead, with the words, as I stood up and brushed my pant legs, “I’ve watched this sport for 40 plus years. There’s an instance of holding on every play, it’s only called by the refs when it egregious. I’m getting a drink.”
I mentally noted, “Someone please call the WHAMBULANCE (courtesy of Urban Dictionary)
She continued to referee from the couch, and largely and loudly, incorrectly. Every time San Francisco scored she would stand up to announce it. A majority of the party was rooting for Kansas City for one reason or another.
Now, it should be noted that Taylor Swift is currently dating Kansas City Chiefs, Tight End, Travis Kelce. I don’t have beef with celebrities, especially Tay Tay. It’s her fanbase I have beef with. However, in the moments that followed another San Francisco score, I was forced to be a situational Kansas City Chiefs fan!
In that situation, I had less beef with the Taylor Swift – Travis Kelce fanbase + Kansas City Chiefs disdain THAN these San Francisco 49ers fans. Later in the evening, these fans even picked a verbal fight with my best friend of 20 years, Scott. In front of his wife, to boot!
Anytime the Chiefs scored, I cheered.
Thankfully, from the midway through the 3rd quarter, those fans migrated outside to watch under the newly built gazebo with their own TV. SPOILER ALERT: The Kansas City Chiefs WON. Honestly, I didn’t know when they left, but when I confirmed they were no longer there, my situational fan issue was discarded.
That’s how I was forced to be a Chiefs fan.
GO HAWKS!
los, Fil-Am Renaissance Man 